Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
