I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
