He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
