I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
