I'm jealous of your bromance
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
