Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
