and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
