oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
