but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
