Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
