i can't believe i had my finger in that
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
