:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
