spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize