I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I need moral support for this bender
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
