Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
You work out of a Hotel?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize