he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
