I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
