You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I still have a little drunk in my system
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
