I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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