was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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