Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
