who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
this will be a night to untag.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize