no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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