marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
