Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize