he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
