I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
