I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
pray to the hookup gods
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
