So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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