yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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