can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
