Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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