i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
