How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
