please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
