I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize