i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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