i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize
