her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize