Just cropdusted the office
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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