get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
