In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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