Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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