I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
