I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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