my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
