You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
literally had 100 drinks last night.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
