Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize