Umm I'm too high to move.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
