Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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