we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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